The Locked Door

As I am sitting here having a coffee after an ice storm I was putting some thought into something that has happened.

In the past seven days I have locked myself out of my house twice. Once by grabbing the wrong keys and the second time completely unintentional. So I thought about this sign and its possible meaning.

After doing a bit of research on dreams and locked doors that the sign for me, in this moment was to stop and get my house in order. It was almost like a universal slap on the head. Many years ago I met a beautiful Shaman and he was asked by someone in our group why he kept running out of gas? I know the clear answer would be "because you did not get gas" however the Shaman had a very different view. He said, how is your life at the moment? Are you spinning out of control, lack focus and are unable to stop for self care? The group was very quiet as they really thought about those words. You see, his interpretation had absolutely nothing to do with running out of gas in the car, it was more to do with running out of gas physically and spiritually. That was a major ah ha moment for me. So, since that time I would step back and look at the situation and try to connect it to something in my house or life that may be happening. Then try to discover what the universal sign for the situation may be.

Many believe that our universe aligns along with our physical world and that the connection can be very profound at times. Some do not, and that is ok. What belief systems we choose is our own personal choice and journey and another's should not be our concern. Place your energy where is best suits your own growth.

So back to my locked door. My life has been a bit of a whirlwind the past four weeks. Something happened that lit my internal flame and gave me a renewed energy. This is great, don't get me wrong however the series of events after have been exhausting to say the least. It forced me to look deep within and pull aspects of my shadow to the surface to fully understand and integrate them. Trauma's that I had hidden nicely away to never be seen or heard of again, pulled up to the surface to face head on! They forced me to dive back into my deep meditation and focus on the energy movement, images and messages. It forced me to be raw with myself and rip that band aid off. It was (is) heavy, raw and extremely healing.

All month I would have the voices in my head telling me to get things done. Stay focused on

a project that I am working on and start setting a schedule to provide accountability to myself. Well, none of that got done. I remained in an insane dream state. Unable to find the energy to do that and unable to literally get out of my own emotional way. However an incredible physical energy. Almost like being stuck on a theme park ride that would not stop. The view was great, the wind in your face awesome but it just would not stop.

I know there have been many subtle clues which I was ignoring. The emotions I was having were nice, comforting and a fresh energy that had been stagnant for so long. BUT, there comes a time when we must get our house in order before that foundation crumbles. The first time the door locked I did not clue in, the second time I stepped back to listen.

You can have both! However my primary focus right now, in this moment must be to get my house in order. Get things organized that have not been since my move, remove any unwanted items that no longer serve me a purpose and place a firm focus on my foundation which is home and career. So as frustrating as it was with a side of laughter, the plan is firm.

The first time the door locked I did not clue in, the second time I stepped back to listen.

Its so funny how our universe is always moving around us, small signs that we at times see and at times do not. When we refuse to pay attention the signs become less subtle. Just in case I stop listening again... I will place a spare key outside.

-Deanna